I actually kind of enjoyed outcast. It… certainly wasn’t a good movie, but it was an enjoyable one. The action was tight, the costuming was pleasing, lots of memorable dialogue and the story, if a little cliche, was compelling. But I have problems. The movie has problems. There are problems. It’s about Hayden Christensen’s Jacob, a former crusader, suffering for his sins, escorting the teen heir to the Chinese throne and his sister to a place of safety after their brother framed them for the murder of the King. Also Nic Cage is in it (as… Jacob’s foster dad or something?). Although we don’t really hear their names until the end and Christensen is famous for playing Baby Darth Vader so I ended up referring to them as Ani and Nic for pretty much the whole movie.
I’ll start with a good point; the action. Every fight scene was pretty well choreographed; it’s a common problem with action movies that the protagonist is pretty much invincible and nothing is a challenge to them. The opposite is true with this movie; every fight is a struggle. Don’t get me wrong - Ani and Nic still slice down far too many than enemies in too quick a time - but they suffer for it. And I like that. There is actually a scene where Ani gets stabbed in the chest. Like, right in there. I think he was being interrogated or something (The finer points of the story elude me. I could’ve looked it back up but I thought the fact I can’t remember says more than I could.) In particular the movie isn’t shy about showing characters get hurt. There’s a scene where someone is blown up with a bomb and you see the teared flesh on the body, we saw a sword go through Ani’s chest, and there’s plenty of arrow wounds. There was a lot of thought into the fight scenes. Now if only there were any thought put into the performances…
By god the performances. Nic was by far the worst at the beginning I thought he was trying to be Scottish but the more he spoke the less sure I was of what he was supposed to be. As a Scot I can confirm that none of us sound like that. Ani’s accent was similarly vague but I think he was meant to be English, although he jumped between Scottish and I think I heard a lilt of Indian at one point. What also dragged me out the film a little bit was how the Chinese characters often sounded quite english too, and some of the acting skill was lost in translation I think, the young prince’s emotionally flat dialogue was a little painful. “Father, No!”, “Teach me to fight” and “I will make things better” somehow all sounded exactly the same from this kid’s mouth. But once you get over the silly accents… some of the performances aren’t half bad. Nic Cage really knows how to emote when he’s not being fucking nuts. Although Ani does pretty much just convey the same mix of anger and grief that he played as well… Ani. It feels a little like Anakin Skywalker woke up in 12th century China and got back to work. Shing, though…
Good point; the villain. The older brother - Shing - is compelling without making him sympathetic. “Heaven is closed to me because of all the things I have done for you” was an honest to goodness badass, compelling piece of dialogue, almost as much as “I will nail your children to the wall.” The guy is a baddie. And I like that. The guy’s motivation is that he feels the throne should be his and he’s willing to kill his family to take it. He’s angry that he had to do horrible things for his kingdom. He’s kind of a moody emo son. If Ani is playing Ani then Shing is playing Kylo Ren.
Amazing point; Nicholas Cage in general. He’s in the beginning sequence, a couple of flashbacks (Ani has a PTSD flashback of what seems to be Nic having a PTSD flashback. Irrelevant. But I wanted to mention it. It was great.) but really he’s not part of the story until about the last half hour or so. And it is the best half hour of the movie. He plays Gallain, Scottish, maybe, former Crusader who I think raised Ani and is pissed at him for things that happened in the crusades. Because the crusades were a bad time. And that is bad. So when Nic turns up, he has snake fists. He has a snake coiled around each wrist and it’s never explained. I would call it a power move but he’s standing over Ani’s sick bed after he was stabbed and passed out in some woods. I like to think it wasn’t scripted, Nic just turned up to the set with two snakes. He continues to chew the scenery for the rest of the movie. Classic Cageisms include out of breath exaggerated laughing, high pitched screaming sentences, non-sensical actions (remember the snake fists?) - so check those off your Nic Cage bingo cards folks. Because he’s the A-lister, he gets the most dramatic death. In his final fight he takes on an army pretty much by himself. They do that thing where they come at him one or two at a time. He actually speared two men at once. But eventually the army remember that they are an army and they kick the shit out of him. With swords. He doesn’t make it.
Annoying point; There were some… brave hairstyle choices in this movie… and it bothered the shit out of me. It’s the kind of thing you don’t notice until you notice but Ani has this mohawk that I’m convinced would be impossible without hair gel. I refuse to believe he wakes up in the morning and his hair just looks like that. There’s actually a childhood flashback and he still had the hair then. It has a spit curl! It’s… bothersome. Nic Cage’s coif though. That’s just majestic.
Favourite point; Ani punches a woman in the face at one point. I guess she deserved it. But it made me laugh out loud.
Cringe point; the romantic subplot. There’s this uncomfortable romantic tension between Ani and Lian, the heir’s sister. They get closer and eventually kiss by the river and it’s so uncomfortable, I mean she’s like fifteen right?
Fuck right off
Basically, the films aight. It’s enjoyable. But certainly not good. I would heartily recommend it if you like unintentional goof or just Nic Cage in general. I don’t think I’m going to remember this movie. But I will alway remember snake fists.
